Last 9 days in Europe

As we sit in the BA Lounge (and search for non-existant lemonade) at Heathrow about to fly to Thailand for our unofficial "honeymoon", I have some time to reflect upon our last 9 days in Europe. Its been a strange 9 days as our last post coincided with the London bombing and our movements over the last 4 days have been greatly affected by that event.

Latvia

Riga is an interesting city. Its a place that has a downtown area registered by UNESCO as a heritage area, yet it keeps developing that area to the point where it may in fact lose its protected status. It has the most extraordinary women in Europe (generally dressed in the highest of high heels, a micro mini and a G-String on the beach) yet its over 40 population are almost always obese monsters, seemingly Russian remnants from the Soviet era.

Fortunately Riga does have some other great sites, other than the people watching (which again is some of the best in Europe for Freaks, Babes and Horrors).

1. Latvia has the best beach in Europe. On a 28 degree day, a 30 kilometre beach played host to the sights and sounds of Jurmala. This beach plays host to a number of lovely towns and about 30,000 Latvians. Each Latvian fits in to one of two categories. Young Men or Women show off washboard stomach or pert breasts while playing beach volleyball OR Old Men and Women wear similar sized bathing outfit to young people with significant fatty abdominal aprons and/or hail damage. It was a great day of people watching indeed.

2. Riga's beach has sand, which is more than can be said for the beaches of France or Croatia.

3. Riga has an amazing cinema where you can pick your own seats and pay a different price depending on the length of the movie and the time of day that you attend. The Finnish owned cinema was fantastic and we attended each day seeing Batman Begins, Madagascar and Mr and Mrs Smith. The former was fabulous, the latter was good humoured fun and the middle one was not a patch on other animation that we have seen over the years.

Estonia

Tallinn may be well be the best old town in Europe (apologies to Dubrovnik). It is simply amazing and its charm belies the fact that it only retained its beauty as the Estonians did not have enough money to tear it down. Its a Northern Brugges (Belgium's number one spot) and it does not let you down.

Unfortunately the English have discovered Tallinn and the prices have risen accordingly. We were there mid week and we only saw one bucks group which was a pleasant change.

Estonia has the most extraordinary jetstreams and it was magic looking at the trails while the sun sets at around midnight each night. 3 hours later, it rises again ready for another 21 hour day.

Helsinki

We spent a day in Helsinki and enjoyed the reindeer and "white fish" served in the market overlooking the harbour. The scenes were hilarious as Finns struggled with the 30 degree day. Obviously they are more accustomed to -30 in that part of the world.

London

Wow, they drive on the left here. It was very difficult working out which way to look as we crossed the road. Fortunately they write "look left" and "look right" on the road here. Thanks England.

After the events of 7/7 we felt the stares as we rode the tube with our backpacks and tried to get from point A to B via C, D, E and F due to closures on the Circle, Victoria, Northern, Picadilly, Metropolitan and other lines.

OK, everyone's been to London, so we won't bore you. Off to RealEstate.com.au to check out the housing scene in Melbourne.

Lithuania

Firstly, we have heard this afternoon about the events in London and we are lucky that we are not there yet. We will be arriving next Thursday and we hope that the city and its people are OK.

Regarding Lithuania, our latest port of call, we have noted a number of very interesting things:

1. While Lithuanian women are visually outstanding, they seem to have an attraction to older, fatter men. Perhaps these men assist in the financing of their outfits, hair and nails as it would seem unlikely that they would wish to hang with these blokes otherwise. Take Anna as an example. She looks similar many of the girls walking around the streets of Vilnius, yet despite the fact she is 20, she is seeking a man aged 30 to 55 to marry.

2. We did not take a city tour in Vilnius as we could not find any tours for an appropriate price. We did however learn about the Pretty Guides. The Pretty Guides are "ready to help you to discover the beauties of our small beautiful country". We learned that the Pretty Guides are university students who charge around A$65 per hour to escort tourists around Vilnius pointing out interesting sites. They will also suggest cafes, theatres and nightlife provided their drinks are purchased for them. One could even take your (in their words) "Immaculate escort" to a business lunch if you'd like. But wait the Western man sees an advertisement for a "pretty girl" and an "escort" and he must think that some extra services or sights will also be provided as part of the expensive tour? Surely you could not pay A$200 for a 3 hour tour and not experience all that Lithuania and her women have to offer? Well the website clearly states "Our guides don’t provide sexual services; they do not enter the customers’ hotel rooms or apartments. No service is provided to intoxicated clients." Oh OK, they really are just Pretty Guides.

Having picked up a lot of brochures on this tour, the Pretty Guides brochure (as passed to me by Cathy with a look of bemusement) is the best example of the local Lithuanian society.

I shall leave the Pretty Guides with a quote from Laura " I really adore Vilnius and am eager to share this feeling with somebody who has not yet discovered its beauty. If you want to fall in love, I can help you :)..." Thanks Laura.

We'd recommend Vilnius as a pleasant stop on the Eastern European journey.

Must go check out Latvia

JPII - We still love you!

I am not sure what the official gift should be for your wife on your five month wedding anniversary. So I took her to a salt mine. Not just any salt mine however, but the fantastic salt mine outside Krakow that the UNESCO people added to their world heritage list in 1978. After the trip, a gift of bath salts was purchased, to be safely carried home to a life where accommodation generally includes a bath tub. The mines are 350 metres deep and were first built in the 1400s. Everything down there is made of salt, including a church, sculptures and the tables in the 115 metres below the surface coffee shop. The one irony however is that when we purchased some hot chips after the tour, they were lacking in salt and a shaker could not be found. To paraphrase an old saying: Salt, Salt everywhere but not a bit to eat.

So yes we are in Poland, and more specifically Krakow. This is the city that gave the world JPII and they really really love him here. A 20 something tour guide yesterday managed to point out at least 20 buildings that had some obscure JPII connection. And, he did it with sincerity. There are more nuns in this city than there were in Italy. There are more people crying in the churches here than there were in Italy and it is kinda weird.

Nothing should however take away from this town and its beauty. Apparently it is now firmly on the tourist trail. The purchase of about 150 6 seat golf carts a year back shows that when it comes to shipping tourists around its cobbled streets, the Poles will think outside the box. We refused the golf cart and agreed to walk.

We made the trip here on an overnight train from Prague (the details of which Cathy will set out in a future post). We were glad to leave Prague. There is something rotten about that city that you would not suspect at first glance. Firstly it is the new European pickpocket capital. Secondly every single waiter has his own scam for adding more money to your bill (our favourite was charging a 19% service fee on top of the 19% GST - Clever!). Thirdly, for the first time on this trip, we saw 2 blokes injecting themselves - and they weren't diabetics before you ask the question. Fourthly, there were that many British men in the city on stag weekends that it makes you wonder what type of a nation England really is. Apparently they like to think that Australians drink a lot of beer. We really can't compete with a nation that sees skulling and vomiting in the street of a foreign town as sport. It really is a beautiful city but it needs to get its shit together before people see it for what it is. An old beautiful city full of disgusting immoral people.

Seems like I'm missing home today. Some things that are making me miss home:

1. A man is leading the AFL goal kicking that I have virtually never heard of. What is happening at home when Mark Williams can be leading the AFL goal kicking?

2. Gee I miss cold milk. Most countries in this continent survive solely on UHT milk. Then when they do serve milk they serve it warm so your Corn Flakes taste like wet housing insulation. Never would I believe that I would miss proper milk but I do.

3. We are seriously concerned that the device we are using to carry our digital photographs is not working correctly. I have visions of us being left with only half our photos (the ones that I managed to burn on to a DVD the other day). The other half were "not there" according to the Kodak guy. Another guy said that our memory sticks "wouldn't read" in his computer today. Without wanting to sound whiny, I just want to get the box and the memory sticks home to Melbourne where smart people can figure out what is going on. Its all a bit depressing really.

Anyway enough whining, we are off to Auschwitz tomorrow so life could be much worse I suppose.

Til next time.